Saturday, February 28, 2009

Episode 14

Episode 14.
The guys ask the tough questions and discuss the issues.
Experimental treatment for TMD? Is menacing subjective? If you suffer from panic disorders, then you probably shouldn't be able to use a gun at your job. Who is this dude that is posting the greatest Craigslists ever? The knife fight is back. If you're a vet of the Iraqi war, are you allowed to steal sweets? (insert M&Ms commercial here). What could a toothless guy possibly want with 7 toothbrushes? If you have successfully stolen 2 40oz of malt liquor, don't taunt the cops, dude.
How much did this guy have to drink, that he urinated on himself 3 separate times; before he got stopped, on his way and at jail?

Idiot Ballroom's Slumdog Thriller rant

After the show (episode 14), the guys discussed an earlier posting of Slumdog Thriller and the mechanics of language. Ewa Unkendra (in pig latin)

Inbreeding continues to trump common sense in Tennessee

I’ve got a sneaking suspicion that this sheriff rode the short mule to school. If you are out there, J.A. Rowland, you had better watch your ass because Johnny Law is hot on your trail (“although unsure if he is alive”) and you will be brought to justice, bitch! What is the statute of limitations on passing a bad $30.00 check anyway?

Drink Up, Chicago!!!

As a matter of fact, that is a bit of afterbirth in your water supply.

And now you know the rest of the story...

So, seriously. This breaks my heart a little. I literally grew up listening to Paul Harvey. He will be missed.

Friday, February 27, 2009

Listen tonight...

Hey, peoples. We be live tonight. Check the right side for details.

Music gets played tonight:

Common People – William Shatner
Plain – Ribbons
Daylight – Matt and Kim
A New England – Billy Bragg
Just A Thought – Gnarls Barkley
Jailbird – M. Ward
Whole Wide World – Wreckless Eric
The Message – Grandmaster Flash

Slumdog Thriller

Whiskey Tango Foxtrot

Dear Mr. Blindman, If you are so blind then how did you know we called you Mr. Blindman?

Thursday, February 26, 2009

MERRY CHRISTMAS!!! (You're busted)

Before I even start, I got to point out that it's a little festive around here. We've got a birthday from an earlier posting. And now it's Christmas time! Yeah.
All right, Mr. Steven F. Lederman. What college did you go to? Or better yet, what church do you belong to that celebrates Christmas in February?
Not that I've participated in any criminal activities in my life, let alone would know the first thing about carrying weed around. But I've got to say wrapping it up to look like a Christmas present, and it being February, is probably the least smartest move, oh assistant state attorney general Lederman.
But even with all of that, I think Reader Reactions poster nkscouting points out the craziest aspect of this entire story. Lederman got a MISDEMEANOR charge for carrying a concealed weapon and a FELONY charge for the weed.

Okay, who didn't finish their cat?

It's an issue when I'm hoping that a half eaten cat was partially consumed by another cat but this wasn't exactly written in a way that makes me completely comfortable with the fact that this guy was not eating pussy and eggs for breakfast, swiss and pussy on rye with mustard and mayo for lunch, and pussy con broccoli for dinner. Dessert anyone?

Happy Birthday!!!

Hey there little tike! Welcome to your life. I know it may seem like things got off to a shitty start but it might get better. I did say might so don't hold me to that because things are looking pretty bleak around here these days. Now I don't want you getting all upset about the fact that you probably aren't going to get to know your Mom too well. Sometimes Moms can be overrated and in your case I'm pretty sure you are going to be better off with someone else in charge of keeping you alive until you can do it for yourself. So get out of the shitter, wipe off that vernix, flush that placenta down that thing you were just in, and get to living.

To hell with this whole "obesity" epidemic!

That's right! I said it. So, what if more than one-third of American adults were obese in 2005-2006 according to a survey from the CDC. Pshaw! That's not going to stop the greatest country on Planet Earth from deep frying everything we find and consuming it in mass quantities, is it? Hell no! Until scientists figure out a way to deep fry a whole cow stuffed with cheese and potatoes, I figure we got some calories to pack on. Deep fried pizza anyone?

Wednesday, February 25, 2009

What's next?

So, you've given birth to 8 babies at once. Have 6 other ones at home. You want nothing to do with the father. You're on welfare. You have a website that solicits donation for your "situation". You have a publicist. And though you have no money, you're in the market for a million $ plus home.
So, what's the next obvious evolutionary step in this trainwreck you call your life? Porn. Sure. Porn.